Rocky Patel Mulligans Unicorn Staff Review
Like a scene in an old-time Looney Tunes cartoon, my wife would smash her rolling pin on my noggin about eight times without pausing if she ever caught me with a $100 cigar in my mouth. That’s too much dough to blow on a single smoke when you consume as many cigars as I do. Mark Twain, notorious for his unapologetic and copious intake of pitifully cheap cigars, would turn over in his grave at the mere suggestion one cigar could cost such an absurd sum.
Luckily, I have no obligation to deprive myself of a crisp $100 bill and risk my better half’s wrath for the privilege of savoring a $100 cigar, thanks to the latest arrival on Holt’s aircraft-carrier-sized warehouse loading dock: Rocky Patel Mulligans Unicorn—a 6.5-by-52 box-pressed Toro. And I’m laying bare all its virtues and shortcomings before I levy my final judgment in today’s product review.
Word on the street is that master cigarmaker Rocky Patel cranked out two or three top-secret, proprietary prototypes for Conviction, the rarest and most expensive single cigar in his vast portfolio of global premiums. But only one recipe made the final cut, upon which the influential editors at Cigar Aficionado bestowed a glorious 95-point rating, ranking it in the ‘Top 10 Cigars of the Year’ in 2024. Monumental accolades befit such a monumental cigar. But where in perdition did Rocky dispense with the backup blends?
When I put my bloodhound-like beak to work tracking down Rocky’s original Conviction samples, the trail led me straight to towering rows of Rocky Patel Mulligans cigars, which consume an inordinate amount of space within the palatial bundle annex of the Holt’s warehouse—much to my astonishment. And but a few rows in, I uncovered a glistening trove of Unicorn bundles, clad in gold-and-espresso-brown bands, packaged in precious batches of 10 cigars, with a staggering MSRP of $1,000, moreover!
How could a blend destined to become the most anticipated and coveted cigar of Rocky’s entire career so easily end up in my frugal fists for the paltry price of $7.99 per cigar? You see, folks, the explanation lies in the fine print of Rocky’s exclusive contract with your pals at Holt’s, granting us eternal access to every side project and experimental jewel bearing Rocky’s fingerprints, as long as the cigars wear a Mulligans band. The deal was engineered to deliver unbridled value to Rocky’s burgeoning fan base, and Mulligans cigars have since grown into the number-one-selling bundle franchise in America, bar none. Unicorn is quite possibly an unparalleled tour de force of taste, performance, and finish.
Rocky poured a literal laundry list of time-consuming, painstaking production details into bringing every single Unicorn to life. Only the top four artisans handcraft Unicorn cigars using a patented recipe of Nicaraguan long-filler tobaccos harvested all the way back in 2014. A gorgeous, oily San Andrés wrapper leaf completes the package after being tightly bound within the bark of a Royal Palm tree during a special fermentation, otherwise known as the Cuban terciario method. The finished cigars rest for a few additional years in custom cedar chests to achieve optimal smoothness before they leave the factory.
When I effortlessly slice the cap between the blades of my razor-sharp guillotine cutter, the Unicorn serves a savory cold draw of coffee bean, Barhi dates, mesquite, and spice. After slowly toasting the foot for three minutes, intonations of espresso, toffee, and anise mingle over a brilliant foundation of cocoa and pepper. It’s clear Rocky pulled out the stops to create the stunning sequence of flavors I glean from the Unicorn.
Over an hour, a long, pristine ash gathers at the foot, perfectly insulating the Toro from burning too hot and preserving its unconscionably smooth texture. Bold but sweet nuances gather in a balanced crescendo throughout the nub, provoking a mix of prolonged elation at the taste and pure perplexity at the price.
The Unicorn is a mythical gem worthy of your hard-earned cash and as much free space as you can allot in your coolerdor. My honest advice: slip into your favorite smoking jacket, swaddle your neck in a silk ascot, and knock back a glass of Louis XIII Cognac by the fireplace with a Rocky Patel Mulligans Unicorn. You can thank me later.
Until next time, long ashes to you!
